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I've been a bad blogger lately, simply because we're so stinkin' busy it's getting harder and harder to find/make the time!  On Thursday afternoon, my colleagues surprised me with an incredible baby shower, complete with a very moving set-to-music slide show, balloons, amazingly generous and thoughtful gifts, yummy food, and lots of love.  Anthony showed up with Beatrice who, as usual, stole the show and just couldn't have been any cuter.  I had been asked during the winter about "were I to have a shower, would I want it before she's home or after" and I easily replied "after" since at that point I couldn't bear one more symbol of her with the uncertainties of when she'd come.  It was such a joy to celebrate with her right near me and to have the people showering us see the smiling creature with whom we get to share our days.  We are so, so lucky for me to have this job and with this group of fabulous folks. Here is a photo after we unloaded the car and Beatrice crawled around amidst the goodies (and the morning mail).  Also a couple of her playing on the porch this weekend with a toy that sets off all sorts of bells and whistles if you put the balls in the right holes.  Beatrice so does not get it, or so does not care for it, because she insists on putting the balls anywhere BUT....she puts them where they come out, in her mouth, or just bangs them on places that are not the "target" spots. She had the most fun crawling under the chaise and banging two of the balls together. It's pretty hysterical to see the world of "toys" through her eyes.  On the one hand, she's making "progress," now stacking blocks and seeming to understand a bit better how certain things work.  Anything that talks to her or makes noise completely throws her off.  We have a couple that even talk a minute or so after you've abandoned it, so she'll be on the other side of the room and all of a sudden Ella the Elephants says "spin me again!" and Bizou whips her head around to look, with a frightened look on her face, like "What the HELL was that???"

We saw my dear friends The Lallys briefly today, the first time since October and it was a full-circle experience introducing her to Susan, with whom I shared my adoption dream many, many years ago.  It's funny because we spent many months assuming and planning for a son, but Susan always somehow knew I'd end up with a daughter. Bizou and I have been extra close this weekend.  She woke up the other night around 10:30 p.m. and we brought her into bed.  We hadn't gone to sleep yet so the light was on very dimly and Anthony and I just savored watching her.  She woke up fully and was just beaming, positively radiant and smiling as widely as a human can smile, crawling all over me, chanting her "mum, mum, muh, muh mum" and touching my face. I've often said that I feel that if she could, Beatrice would crawl right inside of me.  There are times she just can't get enough and it's simultaneously flattering and a bit scary. I very much expected to love a child as much as I love her, but I was completely unprepared to be loved back with such abandon, especially so soon. I'm sure one day soon she'll realize how unworthy I am of such admiration; however, until then, I'll soak up every moment of it!

It's not Wednesday, but Prince Spaghetti Day nonetheless

I always see classic photos of kids eating spaghetti, so I decided to go with it tonight when Bizou's dinner got out of hand.  The damage to her shirt is probably permanent, but she really thought it was great when she got stripped down during dinner.  She was simultaneously repulsed and ecstatic by the feel of cold cooked pasta between her fingers, on her chin,  in her eyebrow, and....you get the point. The other shot is from yesterday.  I realized I don't have many photos of her upright, and she's spending more and more time in that position lately, pulling herself up on anything that's the right height to do so.  I still think she's many weeks away from walking and, after listening to parents of walkers, we're in no rush to be chasing her around everywhere!  I don't think we're too far away from becoming a "gated" home.

Flowers, flowers everywhere!

I was looking forward to planting sunflower seeds with Beatrice this afternoon. We went and bought the seeds and returned home to a package on the porch. It was a box from cousin Margo containing a dozen or so of the coolest handmade flower hair clips ever. What a wonderful surprise and just what my girl needed to look like an official gardener. Here are shots of her doing a clip fashion show before heading outdoors, then some near the garden. She was most helpful to me of course, as she did the following tasks: crushing the envelope of seeds, sucking on the empty envelope, licking the dirt-covered spoon in-between digs, and then nearly falling asleep after an exhausting ten minutes.

A Flower Child and her trucks

Beatrice's favorite toy to play with lately (aside from paper, tufts of Sula's fur, and band-aid wrappers) are these soft trucks/vans from Truman and Hank that she and her dad "brmmmm" all around the carpet.  She's gotten much more sophisticated with these lately as she now puts them on their wheels each time, versus on their roofs or sides! She's also added giving high-fives to her repertoire of tricks.  Here are some favorite pics from the week, including one in this onesie which offers a garden at her fingertips. It was a wonderful gift from Carly at the gallery here in town. Every afternoon or evening Beatrice and I do a garden walk around the house to see what's blooming, ending, or nearly ready.  Right now the peonies and roses are filled with buds, the azaleas and lilies of the valley are in full bloom, the lupines are becoming more and more dramatically beautiful, and the irises and lilies are on their way.  She loves to hear me name each and every plant and thinks "hydrangea" is a particularly funny word. Go ahead and say it a few times, see if you don't smile......This child sees beauty and wonder in all simple things.  What a gift.  And what a gift she is to us.

Probate Court

We went to the town hall yesterday and, after swearing under oath with our right hands raised that no cases were pending for Ngo Minh Hanh, nor was anyone looking for her, our daughter was officially given a new legal name:
BEATRICE MINH HANH FORONDA
I felt a little sad to say goodbye to her Vietnamese identity, but I feel good that we are keeping her middle and first names as her one new middle name. We weren't sure if we'd keep one or both, but when we heard the nannies calling her "Minh Hanh" over and over on the day we met her, there was no question. Whenever we meet anyone who is Vietnamese and they ask her name, we still respond with her Vietnamese name, "Minh Hanh." The next step is to get her a new birth certificate, and then, the real proof that she exists....a Social Security Card. Then even the IRS will agree she's real!

Olga Korbut, sleeping in....

Here are three shots of my family taken between 8:40-8:50 a.m. Sunday morning.  Forgive the poor quality, the shades were down and I took off the flash so as to not disturb the sleeping beauties.  Sula heard the noise and woke up, but didn't leave her bed (there's no door and she can come out whenever she wants).  Beatrice has slept past 8:00 two mornings in a row and I'm loving it. The photo with her legs in a straddle is a classic favorite pose of hers.  I wish I could videotape her all night and count the number of positions she assumes.  When she's in our bed, she uses every square inch of the length and about 1/3 of the width moving around. The other two photos were taken tonight before bath time, first showing off her "battle scars" (and re-enacting the face) from getting blood drawn today at Yale Children's Hospital.  Unfortunately, the first arm didn't flow well enough, so the second one needed to be tapped.  My brother Dan told me recently that you're not really a parent until your child is sick.  Well I think those ten minutes in the lab today count and I now qualify fully.  There are no words for how I felt during that gut-wrenching time.  The only good news is that minutes after it was done, Beatrice seemed to have forgotten about the whole thing. Anthony and I only wish we could! There's no problem, by the way, these are just precautionary tests for a child who spent 11 months in an orphange to make sure everything is okay. Here also she's showing off her toothbrushing skills, or at least toothbrush-sucking skills, as well as her yoga expertise. I asked the doctor why she curls her legs up and moves them around like a newborn and he basically said "because she can!" btw, for those of you born after 1972, insert "Mary Lou Retton" instead of "Olga Korbut" in the title.  I was once shocked when I referenced Olga to a younger teacher and she looked at me blankly and said "who?"  I said, "okay, Nadia Comaneci?"  More blank looks.  Ah, youth....

Childhood

I took this photo on slow exposure by accident on Bizou's birthday, but it seemed somehow symbolic as, on that day, it occurred to me how quickly her babyhood is going already.  People tell us all the time "blink and it's gone" and I know that is true.  I can already feel it and I am trying to savor every moment, even those that are difficult, and remember, as my Mom always said "this too shall pass" and someday it will all be a blur. We have been home one month today.  Already, she is done with formula.  Her size 6 mo. clothes are being packed or given away, as are some "baby" toys. Some days I look at this creature and wonder who she is and where she came from, in the best of ways, and others I feel like she was born in my heart and soul ages ago.  I daydream about her past and look forward to our future together, but my ultimate goal is to live in the present and witness each precious moment as she unfolds into the person she was born to be.

Two Days Down

I went back to work yesterday and the three of us all survived, and quite well actually.  Beatrice has been a good napper for her Papa and visited me at work today, which was a wonderful surprise.  Here's a photo I just found of her making her Mother's Day card for me, which Anthony secretly arranged, and a photo I took of her "helping" Daddy in the studio earlier this week.  By the way, I guess my quiz in Tuesday's "Recycling" post was a real stumper about finding the clue in the outfit which shows Anthony dressed her.  If you look at her blouse, the buttons are in front and the Peter Pan collar was in back.  Yup, her shirt was on backwards, tag sticking out in the front of the neck and all!  Anthony thinks the "buttons down the back" is a ridiculous concept for a shirt.  I can't criticize too much because I didn't notice it until undressing her at night.

One

Beantown

We mourned the end of the 6-week portion of my leave of absence by heading to Boston. We strolled to the Common and went to the Public Gardens to watch the swan boats and see ducks, the swans, the flowers and trees. Then we roamed around Chinatown, which is now well represented by Vietnamese establishments as well, and had pho at our favorite pho shop, Pho Pasteur. (Speaking of which, it has come to my attention that some people think that the web address "thephorondas" was chosen because "theforondas" was taken, but this is not true.  It was done purposely because of the Vietnamese soup "pho" that we love so much and which is pronounced "faw," similar to the sound that begins our last name.) I also got some delicious bubble tea which I haven't had in quite a while. I was introduced to that drink in 2004 during my trip to Taiwan and now it is available in many cities in the U.S. I saw it in Hanoi too but never got it as we were always on the opposite side of the lake when I'd think of it, so I've had a craving. We stopped at a bakery and picked up a cake for the birthday girl tomorrow.  It was such a beautiful day and Bizou is a wonderful traveler and city girl.  We arrived home to birthday cards and a package in the mail with a stunning outfit from my cousin in Paris.  We also stopped at Baby Gap on the way home since Anthony had a bee in his bonnet about getting Beatrice some summer clothes for her birthday.....not that she needed a THING, but we used to go to Baby Gap while we were waiting for the past year and look through the racks and dream of actually having a child to clothe and now that she's here, he wants to actually buy some things.  So we had a little fashion show trying things on, which she was NOT up for, but we made it as quick as we could.. I was shocked that the 12 mo. or 12-18 month stuff  he bought and that was sent actually fit, or was just a little big. She's outgrown 6-9 month stuff now, the 9 mo. items fit with no room to spare, and 12 mo. is comfortable.  I'm anxious to see how much she's grown at her doctor's appointment next week. We tried on her birthday outfit that she'll wear tomorrow and she is a real stunner in it. Tune in tomorrow for photos! 

Got Recycling?

Have I mentioned how much Bizou loves to play with paper, boxes, tissue, etc.?  One of her favorite daily activities is to empty the recycling basket in the studio, piece by piece.  It occupies her as I listen to the news on-line each morning for at least 10-15 minutes.  May she always be so easily entertained!  We had a wonderful visit with Layli and her parents today, and she loves her new book, Brown Bear, Brown Bear.  She also loved a taste of the delicious blueberry scones that Layli's mom Kristen brought over.  I can't wait until the fresh fruits and vegetable of summer come out since she seems to love all the produce I've given her so far.

p.s. here's a challenge for you....find the clue in the photos that lets you know that Daddy dressed her today and not me!

The Lonely Goat Herd

Here are some photos of the girl getting gussied up for church yesterday, and one afterward visiting with Danica and Tito Jun.  Today she "helped" me do some gardening and explore the new things in bloom (azalea and peonies) in the yard, and by "helped," I of course mean watched with Papa, who complained about the mayflies the entire time. Actually, Beatrice complained too when she was sitting on the grass and they swarmed around her. Finally, here are some brand new video clips. Of course I never catch the best moments on tape, but you can see how quickly she's crawling around now and hear a sample of her babbling.  She's recently picked up some yodeling skills, which is actually a cross between a weak yodel and a siren sound.  She says "mama" which actually is "muh, mum, muh,"  "dah dah dah,"  "buh buh" for "bye bye," has said "up" a couple times at appropriate moments and, her most frequent and favorite word/sound is "bop."  We have no idea what it means, but it seems to be a catch-all for any occasion.

  

My Daughter's Mothers

Here are photos of the people who have "mothered" my daughter so far in her first year of life; however, the most important one, her birth mom, is one we'll never see.  Today I honor her for carrying this baby in her body, delivering her safely, and, for reasons which will never be known, choosing for her to have a life elsewhere.  Though I've never given birth, I can imagine the bond that was forged during their brief time together, and her sacrifice has led to my joy.  Adoption is a strange experience in this way, the blending of one's pain and another's bliss, both of which the child experiences.  Vietnam has among the highest abortion rates in the world, yet Beatrice's birth mother chose a different path.  I can only pray on this day that she would feel pleased with her decision if she could see her today.  So today I gratefully celebrate my first Mother's Day, while simultaneously giving thanks to the beautiful women in the Bac Ninh orphanage who lovingly nurtured little Minh Hanh, and, first and foremost, to the nameless and faceless woman who brought this incredible life into the world. 

Busy Day

Beatrice had lots of company today, meeting new great friend Kristin, who finally convinced her to try her shades on.  Also, it was sax-lesson day, so Marina got to spend time with her headband-twin.  Marina went outside and picked this flower for our little Pocahontas.  I was torn between thinking the headband was really cute and thinking it looked like she had a head wound.  Last night we went out for Vietnamese food with Martha & Erik at Pho Evergreen in RI, where Beatrice shared some wonton soup with me.  She absolutely adored Uncle Erik, who held her longer than any person besides Anthony and me so far. After such a busy day, she slept ten hours, all of it in her crib, and here are some photos of our great napper this morning who, as I write this, has been asleep for nearly 2 hours.